If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Randomize
