is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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