sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
