Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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