it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
