im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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