There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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