if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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