so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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