I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
