I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
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