i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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