Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Randomize
