I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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