awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
