Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
