did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Randomize
