i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
