just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
