I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
