office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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