I'm drive I can fine osifer
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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