Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
