so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
