Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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