Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
