i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
