Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i think i have herpe
just one?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
