M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Are we still banned from the library?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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