u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
