Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
