I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
