dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
