did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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