after a month anything with tits is on the radar
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize