he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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