you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
