Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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