Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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