What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
