he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
