Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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