Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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