I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
