when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
