First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
