The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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