I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Randomize
