I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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