party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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